The heart rate increases. The head, it throbs. I change tactics but not the desired outcome. The throat tightens. The breathing audible. The eyebrows furrow. A heaviness in the chest. “But I’m doing what you’re asking of me, God! Come on! Help me out!” I am so irritated by not being able to achieve what it is that I think I want that I’m completely missing it.

It’s God. And He’s saying, “No, no, little one. This is not the time for that.” But there I am, in the garden, trying to touch the tree that He is clearly telling me not to touch. I ever-so-slowly open my mouth, eyes trained on Him, a little wider still as my tongue snakes it’s way creepy-crawly-like ever-so-close to the seemingly delicious fruit. I can practically taste it. I am salivating. I want it! “Did God really say that I couldn’t lick the fruit??? What if I do it for Him???” Though secretly I know it’s a for-Him-for-me. Ugh.

I finally recognize Him. “Oh! Hi, God.” I stop what I’m doing and shake my head. “I’m sorry, God. Help me to recognize the error of my ways sooner. Thank you for your guidance. Thank you for your love.” We have a chuckle about being human and write a little blurb about it. Perhaps others will start to notice God… talking. To them. With them. In them. And through them. Amen.

This was written toward the beginning of our journey as we began learning The Way of Love. ❤️